Meltdown

Monday 8th March 2004

Corey Taylor, back in 1997. Interestingly, just after he did the dreadlock thing; more interestingly, wearing a SlipKnot hoodie....

I'm back. Or, I'm dead, and the afterlife looks very much like the preafterlife, but slightly brighter. Hard to say. I just had one of those special headaches which start right between the scapulae and end somewhere beyond the overdose of codeine.
Anyway: I'm probably alive. You'd expect--insofar as you'd expect an afterlife at all--for the afterlife to be better, worse, or, at minimum, somehow different than normal. And things are still pretty normal here. For example, the laptop is still missing, and the new tower is being dumb at me.
Primarily, at the moment, the issue is that the 200GB drive I grabbed for it doesn't work. So I'm still using this twenty-seven-gig antiquity until NewEgg.com, in their infinite return policies, get round to replacing the damned thing. So getting much of anything done is still somewhat on hold. Which just figures.
On the other hand, if I had any decent drivespace, I'd be able to do a lot with video on the Wintel system. I installed a cardreader for DigiCams, a VIVO for SVideo, and a firewire card for the DVC. Which means that, if I had enough drivespace to transfer more than a few seconds of footage, I'd be able to capture, edit, compress, and upload some interesting stuff which has been trapped on Hi8 cassettes since 1997--several hours before someone stole my Hi8 camcorder [along with--really unfortunately--the cassette it contained just then] six and a half years ago.
Which is slightly telling, in retrospect. There's a point on one of these cassettes, filmed in October 1997, where I mention that half a second of footage should work nicely as an animgif. I guess times have changed a bit since then.
Of course, one of these cassettes includes an impromptu blitzkrieg on Corey in the middle of the night, while he was clerking at the pornshop in DuhMoines, eighteen months before anyone ever heard of SlipKnot. Now that people actually know hat he looks like, due to StoneSour's belated notoriety, I can finally admit that this stuff exists on some official level. There again: if I ever get this thing running well enough to snake the video into some uploadable format, I'll let you know about it.
As for the laptop...I have no fucking idea. It's about eight in the morning at the moment; I guess I'll start calling BestBuy in a couple hours to learn that I shouldn't be calling them to ask where my stolen laptop might be. Which might be a good time to test out the phone recorder on the new tower, thinking about it.
So what else is new....

Michael Jackson, back in 1983, before all the plastic surgery.

So, Martha Stewart is guilty, notwithstanding fifty years' of appeals. Honestly, I haven't been paying a lot of attention to any of it. I'm sticking to my story in this case: I don't know who this chick is, or where she came from; she just showed up one day and started teaching people how to make candles on network television. So she's guilty of something, in any case.
What's interesting, to me, is that the judge is reportedly not intimidated by her celebrity status. Which is probably a good thing. It's not so much that I mind celebrities getting away with things, exactly; it's more that I mind everyone else getting into trouble for the same shit. Fuck with the SEC, and you go to prison; molest a kid, and you go to prison; remotely resemble Robert Downey, junior...there's a theme here.
Of course, in the Strange Case of Michael Jackson, I'm somewhat less concerned about any molestation charges than I am about the future of the mammalia. Don't get me wrong: I'm totally in favour of everything from abortions to StemCell to cloning to bionics; but let's at least keep things a little tasteful while we're at it; I'm not in any hurry to see the first generation of designer homosapiens turn out to be alibinoid verions of Little Richard. Michael Jackson is about three points of difference from violating the copyright on Skeletor these days. Uh...aesthetically. We at gremlin.net make no claims as to any alleged molestation charges against cartoonoid villains. Even ones who personally know HeMan.
Off the record, I've got a few suspicions about Gargamel. No one who looks that much like Ed Koch should have that sort of obsession with little blue leprachauns and that level of discourse with a decidedly broken cat.
On which note: is anyone else terribly concerned about a ComputerGenerated Garfield showing up sometime this year? I'm not really upset that he's CGd, since that's pretty standard [although I wasn't thrilled to see Mickey Mouse genlocked at realtime through a DID a year or two ago; there are some things you just don't modernise], and replacing Music with Bill Murray for Garf's voice is brilliant; but...since when is Garfield fluffy? From what I've seen to date, the cat in this film looks more like Zombi the Cat met Tina Turner's barber than anything I've ever associated with Garfield. Just because you can render with Sasquatch doesn't mean you should.
This is a tangent with no good end in sight, isn't it. Where in hell was I....
So I had a headache. Which may have resulted in brain damage. Or a strangely unnoticable afterlife. We just don't know.
Which leads to my next point. I went ahead and saw Passions after all. If you haven't seen this thing yet, beware. Here's what you're in for: Jeepers stares at the moon for a bit, tells the jews he's the messiah, gets arrested, tells the Romans he's not the messiah, and ends up before Pilate; Pilate wants to free him, but the jews insist on crucifixion; Jeepers gets whipped for a while, losing less than a litre of blood; Jeepers has to carry a cross across Rome, and falls down a lot; a chick who looks like Marilyn Manson might be the devil; Jeepers falls down some more; the Romans make Simon carry the cross; Jeepers dies in a matter of minutes, while the two other guys stay alive; the two other guys get hit by sledgehammers; it rains; Jeepers wakes up all better in a cave; the end.
That aside, the 'net, along with the world in general, are going on about this shit at great lengths; it's to the point that Jesus is more popular than Y'shua. So I've got a whole phalanx of Spams of the Day stored up on this theme....

Cool. I'll take three. But, if these things don't properly affix terrorists to telephone poles, I'm holding you twits personally responsible....

I'm not sure when or why spams started including ghosted shit like 'Contingents Tongs Trooper Commensurability Tombola Bounteousness Galopade Suffusion. Insincerity Fetich Intermutation Lex Torporific Sophist Eloquence Wandering Capilliform Bijou Connate Mopsey Impolicy Tempting Byname Shambling Mayoralty Praxiteles Cabaset Casehardened. Mutation Outrage Antonomasia Scallawag Assignment Dope* Lactean Lounger Saurian Cautery Pasurage Arborical Freespoken Osculatory Elements Salver Misrelation Bedstead', but I guess I'll go ahead and copypaste it here to add the same irrelevant keywords to gremlin.net that they add to their criminally-implanted bullshit.
Let's see: what's next....

~*~ YOUR DAILY INSPIRATIONS FROM QUICKINSPIRATIONS.COM ~*~ Do you share a passion for Christ? If so, we have the perfect inspirational greeting today for you to spread the word. Catherine *:-.,_,.-:*'``'*:-.,_,.-:*'``'*:-.,_,.-:*'``'*:-.,_,.-:*'``'*:-.,_, One of these weird, sickly-sweet spamlists I never signed up for, plaguing me with daily inspirations from a fictional world in which everyone's happy and illiterate. Anyway: do I share a passion for the christ? Yes. I'm just as tormented by this bullshit as everyone else; thanks for asking.

And, finally, of course....

------------------------------------------------- MountainWings A MountainWings Moment #4068 Wings Over The Mountains of Life ------------------------------------------------- These 'tards again. Any attempt to get removed from their various terrorist bullshit is ignored. I'm calling this an act of war. This edition of MountainWings is available as a spoken version. Click to Hear > http://www.mountainwings.com/4068.wma You have to question the wisdom of having a textlink to the illiterate version of the spam. Janavah ======= Gesundheit. I responded to a prayer request as I sometimes do from a lady named Christine. Is it me, or does this sound like the opening line to a really strained limerick? In the response, I pointed out the meaning of Christine's name and how it tied in with the destiny that she was pursuing. She's pursuing a destiny of being kingly? Lesbians for Jeepers. Christine wrote back amazed at the interpretation asking if I had any idea about a dream she had long ago. In a reality far, far away. I present now the dream, the interpretation, followed by the reason that I placed this in MountainWings. To spam like none has spammed before? This is Christine's dream: My son had a dream back in 1993 in which he and I were standing on a stone bridge by a huge mansion. I was dressed in white. On me was a pin. He looked closer and at first it read "Jehovah" and then he watched as it changed to Janavah. This is Christine's dream? She's got an oneironautic mindmeld with her kid? Neat.... I have used the name ever since, but I don't know the meaning of it. I once was in correspondence (by email) with a man who was a French Jew by birth and later spent 11 years in Israel. Probably Corporal LeBeau, from Hogan's Heroes. I asked him if he could figure out the name but he couldn't, even after he had contacted some Israeli friends who couldn't figure it out either. Maybe God will inspire you. Let me know if He throws a few hints your way. The hint the jewish guy was talking about was messianic law--that lark about the messiah having to be fully human and unable to die before all prophesies are fulfilled. This is what I emailed back to Christine, The Interpretation: I will give the interpretation a try. And now I've got a mental image of a fifty-year-old with Downs and a look of painful preproductive concentration. Or Rush Limbaugh. I can never tell those apart. When you look at what changed it wasn't the entire name, it was three letters in the name. Why, that's amazing.... "a-n-a" Ana Ng and I are getting old, and we still haven't walked in the glow of each others' majestic presence; listen, Ana: hear my words; they're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you.... Ana is a word that means: A collection of various materials that reflect the character of a person or place. Hence anaerobic: a collection of various material which aren't oxygen. In the dream, three letters changed on something that was pinned on you. Pin the tail on the strawman. The changed letters spelled a word that meant the stuff that makes you what you are and where you are. A place without oxygen. You are standing on a bridge. Roads lead to the north and to the west. There is a troll here. A bridge symbolizes the crossing over from one land to another usually over a body of water. I thought Mister Rogers was dead.... Water always represents a type of the spirit. Especially firewater. The bridge was stone. Stone is hard and will last at lifetime Like a rock. The bridge will always be there. Unless they move it from London to Arizona. On one end was a mansion. Mansions are symbolic of wealth or the kingdom of God. "In my father's house are many mansions:" I'll never look at Resident Evil the same way again.... There was nothing indicated on the other side of the bridge. So someone sucks as a writer. Since it doesn't appear that you are in the mansion now, it would appear that the mansion is the destination, not where you are coming from. If you'd left the mansion, you'd still be in it. Jehovah (the proper name of God) is represented by the mansion and it is the real nature of what is in your heart. Jehovah is not the proper name of any deity; it's a molestation of YodHehVavHeh, which is a title; the only 'name' ever given to the YodHehVavHeh, in the bible, was, interestingly enough, Jealous. Janavah is the illusion. As opposed to Jehovah, which is a myth. Ana represents where you came from and possibly what has you stuck on the bridge since ana is a collection of past things that make up who and where you are. Uh...did I overlook a paragraph, or did the SpEd just pull this out of its ass? Remember your name literally means God made manifest, Christine, Christ, Jehovah, not Janavah. More applicably, Christine means of or having to do with a convicted terrorist. You are NOT your past, that's the illusion that keeps you on the bridge. Inertia. An object in motion tends to remain in motion; an object at rest tends to be held in place by an illusion. You know there is something better; you see the mansion, yet you are stuck on the bridge because what is pinned on you is neither real nor the real you. And, sometimes, a cigar is just a cigar. Often past things, the hurts, the disappointments, the fears, the traumas, it all holds us from the mansion. They form the collection of how we view ourselves. I'm seriously stuck with the idea of the cops trying to outrun the mutant dobermans, and getting trapped on a damned bridge because some idiot is bestguessing what a lapel pin has to do with anything. Remember, that's how we view ourselves, not how God views us. Which is more the way we view lobsters in a tank. God views you as Christine, you view and call yourself Janavah. Who gave this imbecile a computer? The bridge is stone. Stone is hard and will last a lifetime. Built Ford Tough. The bridge is there. Over troubled waters. You are still standing on it. I'm older than I once was, and younger than I'll be. Ana holds you from the mansion. I don't want the world; I just want your half. He is trying to lead Christine to the mansion. When I grow up, I want an idiot to impose Multiple Personality Disorder on me, too.... The reason that I placed this is MountainWings: Have you ever stood in front of an infinity mirror? It's the type of mirror where you see yourself multiplied and the repeated image stretches back into the mirror as far as you can see. No. But I've done the same thing with camcorders. I'm technological that way. As I woke up the next morning, before I opened my eyes, I saw in my mind's eye the bridge with a single individual standing on it in front of the mansion. WhoopyShit. But it was like an infinity mirror! Yay! Go team! The image was repeated as far as my eye could see with countless people standing on stone bridges in front of mansions. Why, that's just like an infinity mirror! Countless Janavahs. Effects by ILM. You can see the mountain, the kingdom and place where you should be. You can feel the spirit of God flowing all around. But you are stuck on a stone bridge because you call yourself what has been pinned on you by the things of the past. How does this bitch know what Janavah looks like? Was this an oneironautic conference call now? A child of the Father has a right to His name but you are calling yourself Janavah, not a child of God. Uh...does this count as unsolicited legal advise? It's time to move off the bridge to the mansion, to the kingdom come on earth. When you move, there are those with you who you will influence and pull towards the mansion. Tell CarolAnn to go into the light! You are NOT Janavah! You are a child of God. Out of the myth, and into the libel. Take off the old things that have been pinned on you and recognize who and whose you are. Oh: that sort of dream.... The bridge can take you in either direction and it will always be there to take you forwards or backwards. Unless you burn it. Choose ye this day and take hold of what is rightfully yours. Aye, Matey; Arrr.... Decide to make it one less person standing on the stone bridge between what was and what could be. Now I'm torn between the beginning of Twenty-eight Days Later and the ending of Fulci's Zombi. Note: I wrote this issue several months ago. I was led to wait before publishing it. God spoke into my spirit and said it was to be published on "The Day of Deliverance." Fuck. Now I wish I'd read this yesterday, when I got it; too late now, I guess.... I didn't know what "The Day of Deliverance" was so I had to research it. It is a Jewish holiday called Purim. Not to be confused with puerile. The Day of Deliverance is today. As of yesterday. ~A MountainWings Original~ Except for that whole thing about it being a submission. Thank you for inviting MountainWings in your mailbox. Of course, now it's a gremlin.net original, by the same rules. See you tomorrow. More threats. ***************************************************************** Visit www.CryofTheSpirit.com for MountainWings Movies Please help support MountainWings with a Donation. To Subscribe, Un-Subscribe, Get a Book or T-Shirts, Tell-A-Friend about MountainWings, Ask Advice, Rate an Issue, Read Past Issues, Submit a MountainWings Moment or Prayer Request, Make your home page show each days issue or to read Today's Issue in larger easier to read type: Go To: http://www.mountainwings.com MountainWings, 120 Selig Dr., Atlanta, GA. 30336 USA You are subscribed as: admin@wastedinc.com Is it technically illegal to kill a spammer? My lawyers seem to think so, but it doesn't seem fair, to me.

So, that was dumb....
Ugh. If I had any other news, I've forgotten it now. Maybe there will be more by tomorrow.
More later....
--Gremlin