Greenback's What's New Part Deux: Attack of the Jehova's Witnesses

Hi everybody. It's not me again! I'm on vacation. Instead, Greenback's bringing you today's what's new.
Well, what's new. Okay. Our webmaster, or "fearless leader" in the internet lingo the kids are using today, is in Duh Moines. Duh Moines is a magical land in the mysterious world of "away from the computer monitor" where people "do things" "outside the home". He's talking to people that live in this mysterious world where cheeseburgers and cigarettes come from, amongst them Corey Taylor, and calls us on his new-aged walkie-talkie device whenever he can. Anyway, that's why you're stuck listening to me ramble. Neeners.

Why I don't believe in God

Okay, now to "domestic affairs". The houses are fucking again. Repeat. THE HOUSES ARE FUCKING AGAIN!
Now, to what's going on with me. In case you can't tell, I'm not all there right now. Actually, I'm not there at all. I'm here. But, I think I covered that earlier. Anyway, I'm attempting to follow my childhood dream, and becoming a bartender. That my childhood dream was "being an astronaut firefighter with a ray gun" is irrevelant. I can help others be astronaut firefighters with ray guns. Or, I can help them get piss drunk. Wheee! Anyway, I'm actually going to a school for this. I get to learn things like "making people vomit", "pouring things into cups", and the coup de grace, "getting people so fucking lobotomised they empty their wallets in front of me", thus allowing me to dominate all mankind with an iron fist. Mwa ha ha.
As far as Colorado... I'm going to go against my better judgement, and do that thing Gremlin keeps doing, known as "leaving the house". Just a second.
Okay. Apparently, our sun, Sol, has gone nova. The world outside is a mass of white. There are vague shapes, and some of them yell things like "what the fuck are you doing?" and "honk, honk, honk", and sometimes the ever perplexing "get the fuck out of the road". These things are all irrevelant, as the white hot blinding light is soon to vaporise everything that is not indoors, where I quickly retreated. So, there you go. Ragnarok has come.
Okay, website stuff. We plan on actually doing something with Siteofthelivingdead.com. Also, Gremlin is planning on messing with the sanity of the people in the "outside the home" land, and putting it on

I'm gonna fuck ya. Ooohhh, YEAH! SUPER FRUITY!

Grem.tv. Grem said it would be okay for us to do a new index flash thingy, so be prepared for insanity. Or inanity. Or Sim City. I'm not really sure. All I know is that my hands are hitting keys, pausing only to force more mind-numbing poison, known to the kids as "Skyy", down my throat, thus enabling them to wrest control of my brain from the dirty communist socialist feudalist republican jews that currently control it. So, when you see something, you may want to pull your kids away from their monitors, or pluck their eyes out with some sort of an olive fork. It may not be pretty.
Anyway, I'm pretty much done rambling. More later....
--Greenback
 
 
 

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