Posted by Baron Greenback [66.166.216.104 - h-66-166-216-104.CHCGILGM.covad.net] on 23 February 2003 at 20.25.51 ZuluTime:

I'm about to fucking cry. I've been trying to post this thread five times now. The computer I'm on keeps autorefreshing. The last time, I had about two thousand words lost; the time before, about three. Which is ironic, because I was complaining about having to use this computer in the first place. This is a pay-per-minute computer, with hyper restrictive filters that don't even like PDF files. Most of the people here use it to play counterstrike. Me, I'm using it because I don't have my own computer.

Why don't I have my own computer? I had one you know. I had a nice laptop. I really did. I still do, if you ask radio shack. It's just going to be a little while. Really. We mean it.

Maybe I should start at the beginning AGAIN.

So there I am. I need a computer. Radio Shack is the best bet I have, given the limited amount of computer stores that have wireless internet handy. I need wireless internet. So, I get a computer from radio shack. This is where I'm introduced to radio shack customer service. Radio shack has a policy consisting of "keep the customer in the store as long as fucking possible" regarding their customer service. I meet George. George wants to be my friend. George wants to be the salesman I go to whenever I go into radio shack. George takes three hours to tell me this. John is also wanting to be my friend. He was in the Navy, you know. Which is so important, since he's working at radio shack dispensing computers and stuff to customers and all, and I really should care. I explain my need for wireless internet. Four days later, literally, I have a computer, and a cellphone, and a cable and software that are supposed to allow my computer to connect to the internet.

So, I try it. And, it doesn't work. Because, the software isn't set up to work up with my cellphone. But, great news. There's an update specifically for my cellphone that should be available in October of 2002. Aren't you thrilled? I mean, I bought the software in February of 2003, so of course the update is ALREADY OUT!

Like I said, bear with me. I'm not going to cry yet. Not while I still have cigarettes.

I fight with radio shack for a while trying to get my computer online to find out that the update isn't out. This takes a few weeks. I give up and try for a wireless internet card, which is slighly more expensive to set up, but had the same monthly cost.

Whoops, son. Looks like your power cord is a little loose. We'll have to just yoink your laptop while it's in the store and have it serviced. Don't worry, it'll be done in seven to ten days. Yup, it'll be back before you leave in six days to another fucking city.

No, I don't want it to be serviced. Yes, I have the warranty, but......oh. Joy. You sent it out already.

So, here I am. On a pay-per-use computer. My laptop is somewhere beyond the ninth gate of hell. I'm paying for it. I'm visiting radio shack for ten hour conversations that go nowhere, while they chase some of my friends out of the store yelling at them (well, okay, that only happened once, and it was the manager that was doing the yelling).